Filed under: Celebrity Justice, TV, Jon & Kate, Exclusives
Jon Gosselin may have tragedy on his side … the death of the judge’s wife will probably give him a week to spend the loot he raided from the couple’s joint bank account.Judge Arthur Tilson was supposed to decide today whether Jon would be ordered …
Jon Gosselin just keeps fishing for ways to make his estranged wife, Kate Gosselin, look as bad as he does. The problem is that even though she is a bitch, the woman still has enough class and smarts to not only handle herself better in the media, but also prove to be a more attentive parent.
Bottom line, that’s the most important thing, how you treat your kids. Far as we can see, you haven’t even been there to see them in the last 2 weeks!
Regardless, Jon is attempting to smear Kate’s image some more by suggesting that Kate confused the kids into being upset that the show was put on hold. He insists that he doubts his kids were “wailing and sobbing”, as Kate suggested, when they got the news the show may be over.
His reasoning: they weren’t that upset when they learned their parents were getting a divorce!
He says: “…when we told them we were going to get divorced, the 5-year old said, ‘What’s for lunch?’ The only two people who really cared were [9-year-old twins] Mady and Cara. Cara broke down and Mady said, ‘Oh, I saw this coming.’”
What five-year-old understands what getting divorced means?! Give them another year or two, filled with neglect and constantly being shuffled around. Then, they will show some concern.
Ok, so what else you got?
Well, Jon believes that Kate manipulated the kids into reacting badly to the news of the show being temporarily placed on hiatus. He explains that she probably told them: “Oh, daddy’s put a halt on filming. Your friends are going to go away…She probably worded it in a way that’s a violation to them, or their sense of security.”
Well, maybe if you had been at the house yourself to explain the situation to them, it wouldn’t have been like that.
But, oh wait, your endless guest appearances on trashy TV talks shows take priority, right? Right?!
[Image via WENN.]
Filed under: Jon & Kate
Call off the lawyers — Jon Gosselin claims he never took any money from the bank account he shares with Kate.We just talked to Jon at LAX, where he straight up denied jacking the $230,000 Kate claims is missing from their joint account by saying, “I …
With all the press Lindsay Lohan has gotten in the past week, it was only a matter of time before Michael Lohan opened his mouth about his daughter.
Taking time out from speaking on his BFF Jon Gosselin, the media whore father says he’s worried about Lilo’s downward spiral.
But, Poppa Lohan has a plan!
He says: “I’m going to get her off the prescription drugs that she’s on. I hate it when people talk about illegal drug abuse…because it’s not just drinking and illegal drugs that kill you. Prescription drugs can destroy and kill a person and are sometimes harder to stop. Look at Heath Ledger and Michael Jackson.”
Thanks for teaching us Drugs 101, but comparing Lindsay to Heath Ledger and Michael Jackson is like comparing apples and oranges. They actually had very successful careers.
Michael also explains why she’s not acting. You know why Lindsay’s not acting in feature films right now? Because she can’t.”
Tell us something we don’t know!
He goes on to say “The girl with all the talent is hidden and buried deep inside this fungus that’s grown because of the prescription drugs. She can’t be herself. When you hug her she’s like, vacant inside. When she kisses or holds me I get chills, and not in a good way-in a bad way.”
Umm a fungus inside her??? We don’t think that’s from prescription drugs.
Michael rambles on for a while, but never actually says what he’s going to do. However, he does manage to blame this somewhat on himself and, of course, Dina because – according to him – “Everything was fine in our family until Dina and I got divorced.”
Poppa Lohan better get to the girl soon since that whole fashion thing didn’t work out. It’s only a matter of time before she takes a cue from her little sister Ali.
[Image via WENN.]
Our question is, how do we get Jon Gosselin to be suspended for personal misconduct too?!
Mark Heller, Jon’s attorney, who appeared with his client on Larry King Live, seems to be a perfect match for Jon as he is also a real stoopid douchebag. It has been uncovered that back in 1994, Mark was suspended from practicing law for five years as he was “charged with an astounding 38 violations of department rules regarding conduct” and found guilty of 18 of them.
The court found “a pattern of misconduct involving misrepresentation, deceit, abusive treatment of clients, fee gouging, neglect and willful failure to return unearned retainers to his clients.”
That is so ironic since Jon has the same kind of relationship with his kids! What a pair they make, huh?
You sure know how to pick them, Jon. Wonder if all that money he stole took out of the bank went right into Mark Heller’s pocket?!
[Image via WENN.]
Jon Gosselin raided the joint bank account of $230,000, so what’s a possum head to do? Go on the Today show and blab about it, of course! Really, we know more shit about Jon & Kate than we know about ourselves. We’ve been to Jon & Kate, but we’ve never been to us. DAMN THEM! DAMN ME!
Anyway, this morning, Kate Gosselin tried to cry possum tears while saying that she can’t sleep or pay any of the bills thanks to Jon snatching all of their liquid assets. Kate didn’t seem surprised that Jon ran off with their money, because he’s been spending their cash on crap shit (i.e. Ed Hardy maxi-pads and booze). Kate also said that the child army loves to have cameras up in their lives at all times. When Kate told them they had to stop filming for now, they all burst into tears. They were probably crying, because they knew they would be alone with her ass for the weekend.
The next time you see Kate and the child army they will probably be in line at the welfare office begging for food stamps and government cheese. Kate & 8 Plus Government Assistance.
Smooth move, Jon Gosselin.
Jon apparently withdrew a massive amount of $$$$$$ (we’re talking hundreds of thousands) from his and Kate’s joint bank account this weekend, leaving his former wife with a meager $1,000 to survive on.
This being the same bank account Kate uses to pay the family bills with.
Smart.
Real smart.
Kate has apparently lawyered up, and the lawyers have sent Jon a letter demanding he return the family’s hard-earned $$$$ immediately.
Kate’s legal team will also be appearing in a Pennsylvania court room on Monday morning to receive a court order for the return of the cash.
Jon, we suggest you stop asking like a child and fork over the $$$$$ before it gets any messier!
[Image via WENN.]
Yesterday, my cousin was telling me how she caught her son snatching $10 out of her wallet in the middle of the night. Well, if her son was Jon Gosselin, he would’ve taken the whole damn wallet and left her with a piece of old gum. That’s basically what he did to Kate. Radar reports that on the same day that Jon was telling Larry King that he wanted to play nice with Kate, he secretly took a shovel and pretty much emptied their joint bank account. Apparently, Jon rolled away with $200,000, leaving Kate with $1,000. How in the rhinestone tiger hell is Kate’s possum supposed to survive on just a grand?! MAN DOWN CODE 10!
Can you imagine the sound Kate’s possum made when she checked her balance? The day the ear drums died.
TMZ says that Kate’s lawyers will go to court tomorrow to argue that Jon totally gave a “fuck you” to an existing order which states that they could not withdraw money from that account without each other’s permission. They want a judge to demand that Jon return the money and that he be held in contempt. Kate uses that account to pay for household expenses, so it looks like the child army WILL STARVE!
Part of me is disappointed in Kate, because I would have thought that she would’ve emptied that account out as soon as Jon started passing his peen around. She’s not the mega cuntress I thought she was.
When Jon started wearing that Ed Hardy shit, she should’ve taken all the cash and left him with a McDonald’s coupon book. You can’t trust a ho as soon as they start covering their body parts with that Ed Hardy fuckery.
This is exactly why I live by the motto: My money is my money and your money is OUR money.
Filed under: Jon & Kate
Kate Gosselin is drawing the big gun — we’ve learned she’s hired legal pitbull Marty Singer to go after Jon Gosselin … asking a judge to hold him in contempt of court for raiding their joint bank account to the tune of more than $200,000. We’ve …
Since Jon Grosselin doesn’t have a regular paying gig anymore, he’s hitting the ho stroll harder than. Jon’s first stop on the journey to relevancy was Millions of Famewhores in Los Angeles where he made a signature milkshake. The words “Jon Gosslin milkshake” should never ever be allowed to stand next to each other. Millions of Milkshakes should get an F from the health department just for having that shit on the menu.
I’m guessing a Grosselin shake consists of: Ed Hardy’s European beer, foam from the mouth of Kate’s rabid possum head, three dry hairs from Hailey Glassman’s meth brows, Michael Lohan’s enema water, Jon’s undertitty jam, a dozen rotten walnuts, a cup of lukewarm lard, and the tears of ten TLC executives.
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